scientificflair | 006. Anonymous Text

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006. Anonymous Text

[It's quite frankly surprising how many questions and things regarding relationships tend to come out once there's no accountability attached; Descole's been watching this go down for the last two days, and kind of hating himself for the fact that he isn't immune to it.

He hates text, normally; he doesn't like the lack of tone involved, and he doesn't like being unable to read faces or gestures, either. However, in the spirit of anonymity...]

Since no one can tell who we are over this thing for the time being anyway, I suppose I'll bite. Forgive me for using this as a space for venting my own personal issues, but we all seem to like discussing feelings here, anyway.

[NOT. THAT. HE'S BITTER OR FEELING DUMB ABOUT THIS OR ANYTHING.]

How does one tell the difference between someone being interested, in the romantic sense, and someone being interested in you platonically?

And just to head a few sarcastic individuals off - yes, I know that I sound like I've lived under a rock since puberty hit. There's a reason this is being done now.

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[The amount of >8D here, Descole....]

You seriously don't know? This is like, first grade stuff! Please tell me you're a kid. Though from the sound of it, you're not.

But okay, I'll help! First of all, what are your feelings toward this person? Do you want them to be more than a friend? Because if you're expecting them to make the first move, then you've got another thing coming! You've got to act on your feelings!!

[...he's a tryhard.]

Ah, it is all about the subtle things, my friend!

[[IT'S OKAY, MYSTERIOUS STRANGER! ALEX LOUIS ARMSTRONG IS HERE TO HELP YOU! BRACE YOURSELF!!]]

Tell me, how does this person act in your presence? Are there any little oddities you've noticed?

Don't be shy; I will do my best to ensure your heart is set upon the right path!!

[...the edgiest little tryhard, holy shit.]

There are many things I could say to that first part, but I'll just leave it at "I don't think I want to know what your childhood was like."

As for the rest, I'm aware of how I feel on the subject. That isn't what I'm asking about, though, is it?

[...WHAT HAS JUST HAPPENED HERE]

Well. Thank you, I suppose.

I've noticed a few oddities, yes. Namely being far more trusting and open with me than she was, but that could be on account of simply getting to know one another better.

...she also seemed strangely insistent on paying for one of our recent outings. I have no idea what that was about.

My childhood was awesome, actually! Sounds like you're the one who didn't get to experience all the joys of life~

No, it's not. But you're making it kind of hard for people to give advice. If you wanted to remain friends, for example, you'd try to distance yourself a bit, to see how they react. If they got really clingy then hey, guess what? They like you! But if you do like them, it's something entirely different. So c'mon, you can tell me! What's the worst that'll happen?

What's this? The lady was insistent upon paying for a recent outing?!

Ohohohohoho~!

[[Yes, Descole. He just typed that out.]]

Combining this strange phenomenon with her desire to be more open with you.....I think your question answers itself, my friend!

[There is no such thing as a vacation from Responsibility.]

There's really no certain way to tell unless they're deliberately trying to communicate such - and even then, if they're being too subtle, it can still be difficult to discern.

Signs of romantic interest that I'm familiar with involve gift-giving and attempts to spend time with the object of interest - and others, perhaps, but the common thread is a desire to have more contact and build emotional attachment with a person.

Ultimately, it's all very situational and depends on the personality and motive of the interested party. Are there any specific incidents you're concerned about?

Edited 2012-09-15 01:46 (UTC)

...wait. That's really how people go about it? That sounds incredibly manipulative to me.

[Oh my god his body was not ready for any of this - ]

It wasn't like it was anything important - IT WAS ONLY TEA!

[THIS TOTALLY MAKES A DIFFERENCE AND YES THE CAPSLOCK IS COMPLETELY NECESSARY]

[[YOUR BODY WAS NOT READY?

CLEARLY YOUR MUSCLES NEED TO BE TRAINED MORE, THEN!

BECAUSE DESCOLE, REMEMBER THIS!!]]

Ah, but she still insisted on paying for it herself, when tradition states the gentleman should be the one to pay for the date! I think you've found yourself quite a winner here, my friend!

She's obviously fond of you~!

Finally, someone who explains things in a sane manner.

I can't really speak for her motives, because if I could do that this would be far simpler. She's also someone that I had reason to dislike until reasonably recently. As such, her personality is still confusing at rather inopportune times. I don't know her as well as our interactions would lead me to believe.

She comes to me for advice, and she's been insistent on meetings in person recently; she also insisted on paying for one of our recent outings. Nothing important, just tea and discussion of current matters that concern both of us. I've no idea if she's the sort to be subtle or not. Most signs point to "absolutely not," but she also tends to surprise me - also at rather inopportune times.

[oh my god no

please don't get your carly rae jepson all over him he'll do anything]

Obviously she's fond! But even if she's fond, I don't know if she's platonically fond or if she's...fond!

Edited (HE'LL DO ANYTHING EXCEPT SPELL HER NAME CORRECTLY, APPARENTLY) 2012-09-15 02:02 (UTC)

[[he just wants your bb to call you maybe, ok.....]]

I think the first question that you need to ask yourself, my friend, is about your level of fondness! Tell me, is it high?

Once I know this detail, we can continue on in the direction you desire, potentially towards the lady you desire!

It's...moderate? I don't know. I enjoy her company and would prefer that she not get herself maimed.

Let me ask you another question, then.

If this lady does have that rather special type of fondness for you, would you be pleased? Or would you prefer to discourage it?

That might be a little much...

[come on people can't be that b...okay maybe they are, if they're all as bad as that crass man talking about sex

what is johto even]

The decision to pay could be an indirect form of gift-giving. It could also be a way of repaying a perceived debt, if she is the kind to feel that the "coming to you for advice" that you mentioned is an imposition. Or, it could be her nature or her mood at the time.

But you mentioned having had reason to dislike her. Is the reciprocate true? That would affect the entire dynamic.

[It's at about this point that he slaps a filter on the thing, goes down a few lines, and writes as an addition:]

I apologize for being intrusive. If you would like me to leave this at a generality, I can do that:

There are no certainties in relationships, especially of the romantic kind and especially when nothing has been straightforwardly stated. There are many ways of showing interest, many forms of romantic attachments that may be sought...from the outside, it's complicated, and from within the matter it can seem all a huge mess.

[no mincing words here. ~~for once~~]

What it comes down to are two deceptively simple questions. First of all, if she has romantic interest in you, does she wish to pursue that interest? And second, if she does, do you wish to reciprocate it?

You want to know, right? Sometimes you have to be a bit manipulative to get what you want. Besides, it's not like the other person will know!

I don't mind; to answer that first question, yes, the reciprocate is definitely true, and in far greater quantities. She stood in the way of something incredibly important, and I treated her accordingly. Although she wasn't the main individual I was concerned with - her...employer, I suppose you could say, and I have a rather large and at times violent dispute that doesn't seem to be settling itself anytime soon. As such, she was angry at me on both her behalf and on the behalf of said employer, whom she's incredibly loyal to.

However, suffice it to say, our interactions have changed quite a bit over the time we've spent here.

To answer those last two questions, I have no idea regarding the first, as I can't be sure she would say anything, especially considering our history. I suppose my answer to the second would make itself plain depending on how the first resolves itself.

I would honestly think she had temporarily lost her mind.

I suppose that's a valid point...

[RYUUNOSUKE WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO HIM, HE'S TOO QUAINT FOR THIS SHIT]

So what would you suggest?

What?! Oh come now, surely you can't think that little of yourself!! Never be ashamed of who you are! This lovely lady should be honoured that you're thinking of her like this!!!!

[[APPARENTLY IT WAS TIME FOR A PEP TALK DESCOLE IDEK]]

Besides, you haven't answered my question!

[OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD]

We had many reasons to dislike each other in the past. Believe me, it would be a valid assumption; it has nothing to do with confidence.

[i'm sorry were you still waiting for an answer or]

Try it! Tell this person you need some space - or better yet, don't tell them at all and back off! See if they start trying to cling to you or if they give you your space. If it's the latter, then they're just a friend. If they keep bothering you, then it's obvious they like you!

[BUT THIS IS SO MUCH FUN, YOU HAVE NO IDEA!!!!]

And if it's not in her nature to cling?

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